On Listening

We live in a fast-paced world. So many things demand our attention: our kids, the husband, the facebook notifications, the phone call from a friend, the messy house, the full calendar, the stack of books on the nightstand that you promised yourself you would read this year, the 124 pinned projects you want to do and the 301 pinned recipes you want to try… It’s so easy to never slow down, to never stop. Life is loud. Life can easily be lived in a hurry.

And hurry will thwart your ability to listen. 

Hurry shouts over God’s still quiet voice.

Hurry actually believes that everything on the list of things to do is more important than stopping to listen. If God really wanted my attention, He wouldn’t give me so much to do. 

Hurry is self-centered. Hurry worries about appearances. 

Hurry shines the vase, but leaves the inside dusty.

I love the story of Mary and Martha. Martha toils and she does and she hurries and she thinks she’s doing something important. And yet, there is Mary… sitting, fellowshipping, knowing and being known by Jesus. And Mary chooses the better thing. Lunch wouldn’t have been prepared, the table wouldn’t be set, the house would be a mess, and Mary chose the better thing.

Martha treated Jesus like an honored guest in her home. Mary treated Jesus like a long lost friend, someone she just wanted spend time with before she did a single other preparation. And Jesus so clearly tells Martha how He wants to be treated: not as guest, but as friend.

Jesus wants to be known.

I am such a doer. I am task-oriented and a little type-a. I try to earn my Grace that was freely given to me. I tire myself out. But God beckons me, “Come and sit at my feet. Be refreshed. Know me. Let me be apart. Would you stop doing for me and start doing with me?”

This morning, I spent my time reading my Bible and praying. I sat down at the computer to begin writing, and I heard that still small voice, "Will you spend more time with me?" For a second, I wanted to protest: what if I don't get anything written? I have things to do. And God's gentle reminder, "Is it more important than me?" That extra time with God allowed me to see the glowing red orb of the the rising sun piercing through barren winter trees. I sensed His presense. I heard Him speak. I have learned I can do so much more with so much less, when I set aside for the Lord.

Listening is a waiting. Listening is tuning-in, it may even require that you change your location. Listening is a setting aside. 

Listening is stepping away from the hurry, from the noise of life. Listening is choosing the better thing.

A woman who listens is a woman who truly loves and desires God above all else.

Maybe today is the day to start choosing the longest line at the grocery store, to take that walk just because you long to hear God, to close the door to your bedroom and then the closet door and sit in the quiet and cry out for God to meet you where you are even if for but a few minutes. Maybe today is the day to pull over on the side of the road when you are already running late because you hear God beckoning to you thru the wild beauty of His creation.

“The kingdom of heaven is like treasure hidden in a field. When a man found it, he hid it again, and then in his joy went and sold all he had and bought that field.” Matthew 13:44

Would you chime in? Are you more of a Mary or a Martha?

By Grace,

Amanda

Photo Credit 


Click the graphic to see all the other posts in the series.
 

On Spaghetti-Noodle Minds and 7 Ways a Woman Can Maximize Her Time with God

It is said that men are waffles and women are spaghetti. Men have compartments for everything, a time and a space for work, for family, for fun, and even for nothing.

Women are completely different. Everything is connected to everything. We long for quiet time and space. We do not understand when our husbands tell us they are thinking about nothing. We clean our houses while we worry about the problem our friend told us about earlier that day while our kids ram their push toy into our vacuum. We sit down and talk with a friend. We start off talking about the vacation she just had, which leads the vacation we wish we had, which leads to the discipline we think our children might need, which leads to the mess in our houses, which leads to the in-laws, which leads to what we have started eating for breakfast… (I think you get it).

When everything flows into everything how does one set aside time for listening? How does one quiet her mind? How does one meet with God?

Because really, how can one be crazy obedient without the words of God to guide?

I came up with a list of ways to set up your time with God that will maximize that time and draw you closer to Him.

1. Allow God to flow into everything
   Realizing that because I am a woman and everything flows into everything, God can flow into everything. Sacred time and space is important, but who says time with God can’t be in the dishes, or the vacuuming, or the errands I am running. I make it a practice to invite God into every part of my day… because the beautiful gift we have in being a women—when everything relates to everything—we can connect God to every part of our lives relatively easy. We can take God WITH us.
    
2. Pray where your mind wanders.
   I suffer from a wandering mind. For example, I might be praying but all of a sudden my mind wanders to my friend’s troubles and I am thinking of what I can say to her and no longer having a conversation with God. I am learning that God can go with my thoughts. Instead of feeling less spiritual for being a day-dreamer during my prayer time, I invite God into my dreams. I pray for whatever it is I catch myself thinking or worrying about.
      
3. Keep a notebook with you
   If you are anything like me, when you sit down to pray and read your Bible, everything you have to do for the day pops into your mind. If you don’t write it down, you worry you will forget and so you keep it in your thoughts. Keeping a notebook allows you to write your thought down so you can address it later. It helps keep the space cleared and sacred for you and God.
    
4. Pair Time with God with something you enjoy
   The BEST advice I ever got for how to set aside time with God, is to pair that time with something I already enjoy. I can’t tell you how easy it is for me to wake up earlier and spend time with God when I pair it with an iced latte with a tiny bit of chocolate added. I love that coffee. I look forward to that coffee. Because of this, my time with God has become favorite part of my day. It is not some kind of Christian chore to check off my list. It is easy for me to get up early and give God the first part of my day. (It should be noted: I am not naturally a morning person... at all.)
    
5. Connect with God where you connect easiest with God
   My mom has a special chair. I love being outside or behind the lens of a camera. I have heard of runners that connect with God through the pressing-thru of a run. I have a friend that needs a room flooded with worship music. I have a hard time connecting with God in my living room… I see the toys, I worry about waking up my kids, I worry my husband is going to walk in. Sitting outside in the cool of morning is where I most easily connect with God. Driving on back country roads, noticing beauty and pulling my car over to snap a picture is a way I naturally connect with God.
    
6. Don’t just pray, read the Word.
   The Bible is full of His words, so not only can God speak to you through the Bible, but you learn to recognize the sound of His voice. Study the Bible in a way that works for you and your attention span. Meditate on a verse at a time, read a chapter a day, the Bible in a year plan… I often use the inductive method. I read a book at a time, a bunch of times, however much I can a day (anywhere from a few verses to 5 chapters). I learn the history, the author, find the key phrases and words, notice themes, take notes all over the page. If I set myself to read a chapter a day, I fail because my brain wanders. I love history and analyzing… I was a literature major in college. This way of study works for me. I enjoy it.
    
7. Make it a Habit.
   I have heard it said that it takes 21 days to make something a habit. So, every year for the last 3 years I have set aside 21 days for prayer and fasting. I get up earlier. I give God a very intentional and focused hour of my day. This 21 day reboot digs me out of the rut my routine with God has become. It replaces the bad habits I may have acquired over the past year with good ones. So I guess my challenge to you would be to set your prayer time exactly how you would want it to go and do that for 21 days straight, and maybe even consider a fast to go along with it. Every year the 21 days is challenging, but I grow in my relationship with God by leaps. I come out of it refreshed, recharged, and able to easily give God space in my life everyday.

Is there anything from this list that you would like to implement?

What would you add to this list?


By Grace,
Amanda

Photo Credit 

Just click the graphic to see all the posts in this series.

How Suffering Strengthens Obedience {A Guest Post}

Today I have the honor of welcoming Melanie into this space. I am so excited to introduce you to her. I love her writing because of her fresh prespective, her honesty, and her way of seeing God in the everyday. When I met her in person at the Allume conference, I instantly felt she was a kindred spirit. She is meek and gentle and speaks with such love. I love reading what she writes... I think you will too ;)

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My favorite chair beckons. It’s been prepared, an afghan, my journal and my chai. I give God what must have been an obligatory question, “what should I write on?” But my thoughts have already marched down a path and I’d just like Him to come along. He blocks my marching.

Write on Suffering and Obedience.

“I think that’s a great idea. But you see, God, it will be posted on a Friday. I was really thinking of something lighter. Maybe more… cheerful?”

Do you believe that trials and waiting and sorrow have been part of you knowing me?

“Well, yes. It has been part of my story. My journey. The place where you intimately shaped me.”

And do you think that has led to greater trust in Me?

“Absolutely. A trust in your goodness and comfort. But you see, I’m writing on someone else’s blog.”

No response

“And well, I don’t want them to think I’m weird.”

I imagine He smiles. He doesn’t need to say much more. It rings true. This long walk through life that He and I have had. 

“Father, the trials in my life have indeed led to greater trust in you. As we have wrestled, surrendered and wrestled some more. You have gotten bigger, out of my safe box. And with trust and love growing, so has my desire to obey you.”

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A snapshot of our dialogue. Of living out, will I choose to be obedient? When he whispers. When he stirs up a storm. And in the moments when my heart and mind debate, these following stories cross my radar. 

The first from a memory. It’s Valentine’s Day 1999. We’ve only been dating a few weeks. All the restaurants are booked and so he creates a makeshift one of our own. In his mechanical engineering lab at his grad school. Blankets cover equipment and air flow tunnels. A crock pot simmers. Candles and flowers. Two tickets to a Big Ten basketball game after dinner. All the ways to my heart.

A few tears come when I realize I’m not remembering this story because it’s Valentine’s Day next week. I’m remembering it for the gift. A book. Hinds Feet on High Places by Hannah Hurnard. It’s an allegory of the Christian journey. Much-Afraid travels far from her family, The Fearings, to the high places of the great Shepherd. Her companions on the journey are Sorrow and Suffering.

“The Lord makes my feet like hinds’ feet and sets me upon High Places.”

Psalm 18:33 and Habakkuk 3:19

I won’t include any spoilers- if you haven’t read it, I couldn’t encourage you more to pick up a copy!  The journey she takes is transformational, abounding in love. A story of obedience accompanied by Sorrow and Suffering. Obedience that changes not only fears and hearts, but also bestows them with new names.

I loved the book when I first read it. How little did I know that her journey would be similar to ours in our hopes to be parents. Traveling every month with Sorrow and Suffering. Constant companions in our labor to bring new life. Wanting to walk with the Shepherd but wondering why some days he seemed around the bend, out of ear shot. 

The second is a poem that a friend shares.

The Well of Grief

Those who will not slip beneath
the still surface on the well of grief

turning down to its black water
to the place that we cannot breathe

will never know
the source from which we drink
the secret water cold and clear

nor find in the darkness
the small gold coins
thrown by those who wished for something else

~ David Whyte ~

I first came across this poem several years ago. We were in the midst of having had several miscarriages. I’m sure you can identify with grief being a “place that we cannot breathe”.  But that is also the place where we discover the “source from which we drink” and we find riches that can only be found when we go there. I had not thought of these words in many years. And they come back in God’s way and timing.

That these two stories come across my path amazes me. They catch my breath because I suddenly become aware that God is very much with us. He gives both confirmations that this is what to write about. Then he gives the content too.

He focuses me back on the beauty of which suffering unveils. The losses, disappointments and trials of life become means of grace. Walking these paths produces obedience. However walking the path is not my first reaction. I tend to go one of two ways when trials detour me.

1. I give up. I deny the very desires God has placed in me. I try to look like a good Christian, a false sense of trust. “I should have known better.” “I never really wanted to be a mom.” “I am just fine, God is in control.”
2. I strive. I decide to make things happen at all cost. I run ahead and help God out. “If I just work harder and try more.” “I deserve to be a mom.” “Good things come to those who go out and get them.”

But what is the way that God invites? Wait. And He will lift me up. 

Still enough that my soul feels the weight, the sadness, the injustice. Letting layers and platitudes go, so that my heart breaks.

Bringing all of the shards of a broken heart and disappointment and confusion of dreams lost to the only one who has strength enough to hold it. Knowing that to Him, my questions are never too much. My tears are never rejected.

Seeking his face, that is where my obedience lies. Not pretending. Not fearing. 

Letting him restore me. That is where my obedience grows. 

Obedience connected back to the life giving vine. Letting him know we are dying inside while we tell the world we are doing fine. Letting him give,  out of the vastness of his resources. Connecting back  to him when we have no strength left. 

We bring him our hearts. Not sugar coated. Not what we think we ought to bring. In this obedient space crafted by sorrow, this is where we can begin “to run in the paths of his commands for he has set our hearts free.” (Psalm 119:32)

This is where we long for the day where “sorrow and sighing will flee and gladness and joy will overtake them.” (Isaiah 35:10)

This is the soul expanding place where obedience shines in its reward and joy takes the stage.

Thank you Amanda for opening your space! It’s fun to come over and notice God together in this journey of Crazy Obedience.

Melanie writes at Blue Marble God on noticing God in everyday life. She’s a pastor’s wife who loves exploring life with her husband Rob, embracing motherhood via adoption to Samuel and drinking chai.

{top image credit}

What if God Asks Me to do Something Weird?!

 

I was in Marshall’s with my sister admiring little girls’ clothes. We were laughing atwith each other.

A noise breaks through the sound of our own laughter—yelling. I hear it coming from different locations in the store.

As the intensity of the noise increases, fear rises in my heart.

“Do you hear that? What is that noise, Kelly?”

I look around and see about a dozen full grown Latino men in flannel and dickies, some sporting tear drop tattoos (what we call cholo-wear in California. In case this is specific to California, allow me to educate you: cholo is slang for latino gangster). The men are shouting. A few have megaphones. They are all over the store.

I'd spent enough time living in this world to firmly believe that we either needed to duck underneath the clothes racks or run for the exits.

My heart is racing. My fight or flight responses have kicked it into high gear.

Run? Or Hide?

“Dude, Kelly. We need to get out of here now.”

And then I hear it:

“I just want to tell you Jesus loves you.”

One of the supposed “cholos” hands me a flyer to an event.  And then he tells me. “We’re just here to tell you Jesus loves you.”

I am stunned. I don’t want his flyer. I don’t want his Jesus. I don’t want anything he’s offering. I just want out of that store and maybe a brown paper bag to breathe into.

The men were kicked out of the store. As I watched them parade through the parking lot, I saw innocent shoppers briskly power-walking into the stores, hanging their heads, just trying to be invisible to the army of ex-cholo Jesus-lovers. I was perplexed. Is that you God? Is that how You want to be made known? Does that really work?

God didn’t give me an answer. I got the distinct feeling it was between the zealous ex-gangsters and God. 

But it did get me thinking.

I want to make Christ known. I want to bury my life to see Christ raised up in me. I want to be that foolish thing that confounds the wise if that’s what it takes. I want to see God move through me so that the only explanation of how it worked is the power of God.

I will be foolish. But I really, really don’t want to be weird.

I don’t want slam through a department store armed with a megaphone because, to be quite frank, it’s obnoxious and it scares people. I don’t want to stand on a crate on a street corner declaring, “The end of the world is near. Turn and repent from your wicked ways.” I don’t want to pray really loudly in tongues for a waitress in the middle of her shift, trying to exert my hands in such a way that she will be “slain in the spirit”—in the middle of a busy restaurant when she reluctantly let me pray for her. (True story. I was that waitress.)

But at the same time, I want to follow the promptings of the Holy Spirit. Because, really, who am I to judge whether or not God asked someone to do any of those things I consider weird?? If but one person comes to know Christ as a result… isn’t it worth it? And shouldn’t I be willing, if God asked it of me? Who am I to do all the sense-making anyways? Aren’t God’s ways beyond our own?

So I have been praying through a list of things that could clarify at least in our own hearts the difference between foolish and weird.

Foolish:

• Foolish is abandoning the fear of man.
• Foolish is going lower instead of higher.
• Foolish is seeking to be last instead of first.
• Foolish is upside down.
• Foolish doesn’t make human-sense.
• Foolish is hiding yourself in God.
• Foolish is refusing to make a name for yourself, but rather bringing glory to His name.

Weird is actually the opposite.

Weird:

• Weird wants attention.
• Weird thinks there is a formula to the power of God. It tries to manufacture what only God can do.
• Weird actually makes sense to the weirdo.
• Weird is uncomfortable in one’s own skin and overcompensating for it.  
• Weird wants to be important, recognized.

{Bottom line: The difference between foolish and weird is really found in the motives of my heart. Pride seems to have a funny way of discoloring faith put into action. The best way to avoid being weird is to simply walk in step WITH Jesus.}


What do you think? Anything to add to the lists? And then the big question, can you abandon fear and reason and do whatever God would ask of you??


Looking forward to some conversation on the matter.


By Grace,
Amanda



To read all the posts in this series, click the graphic.

What Obedience Really Means

I had worn some kind of title, some kind of position of authority, since a few months after I started going to the church I now attend some 12 years ago. I had always felt a call to do the work of the ministry. And then I became a momma. And it wasn’t just the cut-and-dry you are a mom now, no more work for you. It was when I felt the pull of home against the pull of work, my relationship with God came unraveled. This task-oriented, over-achiever had built so much of her relationship around doing, and now I couldn’t do very much.

I defined myself by what I did.

When you are stripped of what you think gives you worth, you discover your worth in God's eyes. And sure, God is all about ministry. But ministry does not equal relationship. Ministry without relationship goes by another name: religion. And a minister without relationship goes by another name: pharisee.

And what made me a religious pharisee??

The fear of man over the fear of God.

“No one can serve two masters; for either he will hate the one and love the other, or he will be devoted to one and despise the other.” Matthew 6:24

Grant it this verse is referring to wealth, but I think the truth here applies to approval as well. I was serving man’s approval--my own desire to be wanted, and trying my little heart out to build my own place in the world. So long as I preferred to serve my own ambition and my need to not face rejection, I couldn’t truly serve God.

I have always had this need to be seen, to be liked. (I talk more about this here). I remember driving through the industrial section of my town, the road stretching on with cold steel frame buildings, logoed trucks, tractors, and one bar called “The Watering Hole.” Men at work. And I cried out to God, revealed the most vulnerable, raw part of myself… what if I walk away from it all, and no one sees me, no one cares about me, no one wants to know me? What if I lose this place and discover there is no place for me?

God’s soft voice kept playing on repeat: Find your place in Me, Amanda. Find your place in Me.

Through tears, I released. I let go. I surrendered. I jumped into my fearful unknown—being a nobody.

I jumped hoping God would catch me, hoping I would have a place in Him after all.

It’s been almost a year—a year of walking with God, knowing Him, and being known. A year of finding myself in my Father’s eyes. A year of stripping away the things that I defined myself by and allowing God to define me.

The biggest gift this past year? I can honestly say that I love God, I might even be able to say I love Him more than anything.

More than anything.

Obedience isn’t about what you do FOR God. Obedience is doing WITH God.

Obedience flows from a place of love and humility. Obedience is abandoning your own way. Obedience is leaning in close to hear God’s plans.

Obedience starts at square 1: knowing that God loves you and you don’t have to do anything to earn that love.

And square 2?: You falling in love with God—knowing God—finding your place in God.

It’s abiding in Him and that apart from Him you can do nothing.

It’s simply knowing God.

And the only way to get to know Him? Spending time with Him. Allowing Him to have a place in every part of your life. Reading His Word. Not just talking but listening.

“No longer do I call you servants… but I have called you friends, for all things that I have heard from My Father I have made known to you.” John 15:15

Do you hear Him calling? That still quiet voice. Come away with me. Come taste and see that I am good. Come and know me, know my ways. Find your place in me.

Do you struggle with wanting people’s approval more than God’s??

By Grace,
Amanda

The Best Place to Start a Topic Like Obedience...

Today marks the beginning of a series called Crazy Obedience. You can read more about this series here, here, here, or here (just click one, it’s the same post located at different blogs). As a reminder there is a giveaway going on that ends tonight at midnight, so if you were wanting a chance at winning, do sign up!

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Photo Credit, words added by me

I feel hesitant to write on such a big topic… and one so widely spoken on and written about. But I know deep down in my knower, that this is exactly where I must start this series.

God's Love.

Vast. Immeasurable. Big. Wide. Deep. Unfathomable.

“And may you have the power to understand, as all God’s people should, how wide, how long, how high, and how deep His love is. May you experience the love of Christ, though it is too great to understand fully. Then you will be made complete with all the fullness of life and power that comes from God.” Ephesians 3:18-19, NLT

I think of my kids. I remember potty training Addy: 9 months long and a whole lot of tears. And my daughter may have been stubborn. And she may have gotten it wrong for what seemed like a really long time. But my love never wavered. My patience was tested, my vocabulary was improved (because let’s not even go there with the things I really wanted to say after the 5th accident in one day), but my love was constant, steadfast, and immovable.

God’s love is like that. Constant. Steadfast. Immovable. You can’t earn it. Try to be worthy of it. You just have it.

I think this truth is a really important place to start in the pursuit of crazy obedience. Here’s my reasons:

1. You need to know that if you never do anything of any significance for God—never lead a soul to Christ, never lay hands on the sick, never give a large sum of money to the church—you and God can still be okay. This is not me saying to sit back on your blessed assurances and never do anything for the cause of Christ. This is me saying that you can’t earn God’s love. So often, the zeal of doing for Christ can warp into this “look at me and how much I am doing for God.” I say this because our own pride will turn wanting to live for Christ into a contest of accomplishments. 
2. In remembering how much God’s loves me, I remember how much God loves everyone. The gang banger, the homeless beggar, the prostitute, the transvestite, the prisoner… and God doesn’t label them. He just loves.  
3. One of my pastor friends had this on his facebook wall (I so swooped. Thanks Nathan!): You cannot give what you have not received. If you haven’t received God’s love, how can you share it??

Above all else, God wants your heart. Not your achievements.

God chooses to use us… earthen clay vessels so that we can testify to the surpassing greatness of God. God doesn’t need us. He chooses us. Your achievements mean nothing if you can’t manage to live knowing God.

“You’ll protest, ‘But we’ve known you all our lives!’ only to be interrupted with his abrupt, ‘Your kind of knowing can hardly be called knowing. You don’t know the first thing about me’.” Luke 13:26-27, MESS

Sometimes I can be a little type-A, and I totally struggle with trying to earn God's love. Sometimes I get wrapped up in people pleasing and in trying to add to my list of acheivements so that I look okay to everyone else. But what freedom is found in this simple message: God loves me and doesn't need me to do anything! God rewarded Mary who sat at His feet and got to know Him over Martha who toiled over cleaning and preparing and doing.

I stand back in awe of God. His deep Love; His upside-down, last-will-be-first kingdom; and the invitation to know--really know--the God of the universe.

Wow. We are offered the chance to KNOW Him.


So, I guess the question is: do you KNOW God? And do you know how much God loves you?



By Grace,

Amanda




Want to read more posts on this series? Click the graphic.

If you would like to take the 30 day challenge to grow in obedience (and what it really means to follow Christ), you can sign up to join the facebook group here. 

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I Might Just Burst with Excitement! {An Announcement}

Today I have the honor and privilege of kicking off a month-long series at some dear friends' blogs.

And I am doing the series here too.

And I really want you to do the series with me.

I've been praying and fasting and preparing for this for a few months. YEEE!

I'm a little (yeah, okay, A LOT) excited about all this.

So, would you join me at one of these places so I can tell you all about it?? (There's a familiar testimony, a challenge, a chance to learn how to really follow Jesus with a bunch of heart-sisters from all over, AND a giveaway.)

Blue Marble God
Faith and Simplicity

My Words, His Glory

Shine, Sister, Shine

See you in a few ;)

By Grace,
Amanda